of thinking. I have such grand thoughts. Man, if I lived the life of my thought pattern, I would definately kick ass. The truth is most of my intentions never make it to fruition. I wonder why. I really have no excuse but I can make excuses very easily. It's a self defense mechanism. The days slip by and nothing gets done and I always stand up for myself and say it's ok and then go on thinking.....about things I never do. I do have a giant master plan dreamed up. I was called out on this once.....and the person said, "What if the person you want to be isn't really the person that you are?" Hmmm. That is deep, isn't it? I know what I like, who I want to be, what I want to do, where I want to place my focus...and yet, I don't do it. Am I afraid of what may happen if I do?? Is that it? OR am I just so out of touch with myself that I don't really know all those things at all. Maybe the answers to all those things is something completely different than what I am thinking and that is why I am not responding to my own brain. Weird stuff, isn't it? Is this the beginning to my losing my mind and going insane? It could be because laying here thinking is driving me crazy. I thought i was going to sleep. Now, I just am gonna lay here and think more until I can figure this out. It may be a long night. I'm gonna need a notebook because I may have to take notes and write down ideas and make a few checklists.......I guess while I am working on this project, I will think about the rug burn I have on the back of my thigh from riding down the stairs at Ronnie's house last night because that is what I do at family gatherings. You know, put your hands up and slide down the stairs on your butt. It was just as fun last night as it was 45 years ago. Is that the kind of person I want to be?? YES! This I know for sure.
